My experience has been pretty smooth. I placed my order at the dealer on 11/23 for a 22 model, received a confirmation email of my order from Ford on 11/24. On 12/16 I got my VIN and a build week of 2/7. I checked with the dealer yesterday just to see if there was any changes and he went in the system and actually gave me a build start day of 2/10. My Raptor is equipped with the 801A, Moonroof/Power Tailgate Pkg, Sprayed in Bedliner, Auto Start/Stop delete.
I would suspect your dealers do not have an allocation to sell you and they might not be totally truthful. As I understand the Ford process, that if the dealer has the allocation, the order is submitted as a sold unit with your name and is given a build priority over non-sold allocations.