I found my Raptor….

[GCATX]

Don't buy it "with out" her. Take her and make her test drive it. Also make her drive your Colorado to the dealership. Put some zip ties on the driveshaft so it makes a bunch of racket on the trip to the dealer.

 

[MarkM98]

You have bigger problems than wanting a Raptor then. You should already have a divorce lawyer, because that’s where it’s headed.

I hate to be a doomsayer and all, but if that’s a direct quote, you already know this, but perhaps don’t want to admit it to yourself. Nobody likes to fail, especially after a really long investment in time, effort and not to mention the emotional investment. So don’t look at it as failure. This is a life lesson; you can either learn from it or not.

You’re already “done”, because women who respect their husbands know better than to drop that line lightly. I say that on year 27.75 of my ’starter’ marriage. There’s give an take in every marriage, and mine has been mostly up - like 90+%. Really, I have little to complain about and I’ve seen some spectacular blow ups from other couples. Happens to us too, very rarely. But the only ultimatums or lines in the sand we draw are health related, doctors orders, etc. Never like you’ve quoted.

I’m genuinely sorry this has come up and will even go as far as to say I hope I’m wrong. But I’m not.


I’m not sayin’... I’m just sayin.

I get it. I’m frustrated yes…. It shouldn’t be this hard to get something I’m working my ass off for…. I’ve lost count on how many times I’ve looked at and test drove Raptors over the last few years. At this point this deal needs to just happen. No better time than now.

I’m not wanting to bash on my wife and yes the time invested with the relationship is a big deal to me. I also am one that doesn’t want to break the vow I took before God with her. Don’t get me wrong though, I do feel like she is too bossy and disrespectful about things with me she shouldn’t be. I’ve always been a car guy, and driving something I’m into and can do some mods on is what I like to do. I think most of us here on FRF are that way to some degree.

With that said, we are still working this out. I put a deposit down today on the Raptor so I can at least have a few days to work this out with her. The dealer said with the deposit I put down that I would have 7 days. And if it doesn’t work out, I can get my money back.

Stay tuned.

 

[MarkM98]

Don't buy it "with out" her. Take her and make her test drive it. Also make her drive your Colorado to the dealership. Put some zip ties on the driveshaft so it makes a bunch of racket on the trip to the dealer.

I’m trying to work that out. The down side is this is a small town dealer, and the hours don’t play well with our work schedules. I should have taken the overnight test drive when it was offered (hindsight is always 20/20) I need to see if I can borrow my brothers 2017 Gen 2 and then let her drive it to see how the Raptors are. She liked my buddies Ram Rebel she got to drive back in 2018. I think she would like the Raptor a lot more. With that said, she currentLY drives a 2015 Tacoma TRD Sport.

 

[Gumby]

@MarkM98 I want to know her reason! why don't you want me to have something I want? we can afford it? Have you refused her something she wanted? is it revenge? is it safety? is it price? is it Ugly to her? I would need to know her reason she has one in her mind. Is she afraid you are too sexy in it? find out your reason you might be one step closer to your raptor. Because I said no you can't have one!!! is only a reason when you are under 18 or live with your Mommy and Daddy!!!!!!

 

[MarkM98]

@MarkM98 I want to know her reason! why don't you want me to have something I want? we can afford it? Have you refused her something she wanted? is it revenge? is it safety? is it price? is it Ugly to her? I would need to know her reason she has one in her mind. Is she afraid you are too sexy in it? find out your reason you might be one step closer to your raptor. Because I said no you can't have one!!! is only a reason when you are under 18 or live with your Mommy and Daddy!!!!!!

Exactly… when she was looking for the truck she was replacing the totaled out Yaris, we went and test drove 2 colorado’s, and 2 different Tacomas. I wanted her to take a look at the brand new Tacomas because they were not that much more than the used ones. (we were paying it off after the settlement check cleared) She didn’t want to look at the new ones because they didn’t have camper shells on them. One of the Tacomas we test drove before did and that was the selling point she was looking at. And my opinion didn’t matter one bit. She complained and cried that we wasted time on looking around when we should have just went with that one with the camper shell on it. So we did. So she got exactly what she wanted. I’m sitting here having had a Red Focus ST which I was made to settle for then I traded it off on the Canyon I own now. Both times I was made to settle for something which I didn’t exactly want. The Canyon situation was during COVID and I was screwed out a Raptor at that time anyways by the market. 2019/2020 was the time to buy. So now things for Gen 2’s are looking better again and I found this 2019 Raptor that fits what I want. I will be making this point in the conversation tomorrow. Since I am the main bread winner, I should be able to get something I really like and not want to trade off 18 months later….

 

[Nex]

If nothing else, buy the shovel you really want...

 

[smurfslayer]

I’m not wanting to bash on my wife and yes the time invested with the relationship is a big deal to me. I also am one that doesn’t want to break the vow I took before God with her. Don’t get me wrong though, I do feel like she is too bossy and disrespectful about things with me she shouldn’t be. I’ve always been a car guy, and driving something I’m into and can do some mods on is what I like to do. I think most of us here on FRF are that way to some degree.

With that said, we are still working this out. I put a deposit down today on the Raptor so I can at least have a few days to work this out with her. The dealer said with the deposit I put down that I would have 7 days. And if it doesn’t work out, I can get my money back.

It’s obvious this isn’t sitting well with you and hasn’t been for some time. Yes, you made a vow, so did she. The Raptor isn’t the central issue here, it’s a personality issue. She’s basically controlling you, actively, passively or whatever way she needs to get her way. Trust me when I tell, that is not the norm, it’s the exception. If she wants to be the exception, well then you have a choice to make. Really, it’s not so much about compromise as it as about wanting the same things, moving in the same direction, working with and not against each other. You’re not going to be happy long term with this dynamic. If you want to save it, I’d strongly suggest counseling.

And I’m sure she will turn on the anger and then the faucets at the mere suggestion, and if so, that just proves the point.

Do what’s best for you; the singular you.

 

[GCATX]

Exactly… when she was looking for the truck she was replacing the totaled out Yaris, we went and test drove 2 colorado’s, and 2 different Tacomas. I wanted her to take a look at the brand new Tacomas because they were not that much more than the used ones. (we were paying it off after the settlement check cleared) She didn’t want to look at the new ones because they didn’t have camper shells on them. One of the Tacomas we test drove before did and that was the selling point she was looking at. And my opinion didn’t matter one bit. She complained and cried that we wasted time on looking around when we should have just went with that one with the camper shell on it. So we did. So she got exactly what she wanted. I’m sitting here having had a Red Focus ST which I was made to settle for then I traded it off on the Canyon I own now. Both times I was made to settle for something which I didn’t exactly want. The Canyon situation was during COVID and I was screwed out a Raptor at that time anyways by the market. 2019/2020 was the time to buy. So now things for Gen 2’s are looking better again and I found this 2019 Raptor that fits what I want. I will be making this point in the conversation tomorrow. Since I am the main bread winner, I should be able to get something I really like and not want to trade off 18 months later….

Yikes.

I hope you are young and can start over again.

 

[Gumby]

Get a reason. Then you will know. There got to be one. Then you have to figure out if it is a hill you want to die on

 

[So-Cal-Al-52]

When I was working out the deal on my current CO 37 my wife was a bit skeptical. When she first saw it she said" that looks like a giant traffic cone, why would you want that"?. 9 months later she loves it and can distinguish between all the Generations and colors. I have her drive it now and then and when she gets home she says " I see why you like this truck so much". It took sharing my passion and getting her involved. But I will say that she has never told me no, we both work and tend to buy what we want.

I don't want to speculate with your situation, but something seems a little off, you shouldn't always have to settle. Someone up above said you only live once, I agree, sometimes you gotta do what you want. Good luck with making this happen, I sure hope we can see pictures of your truck soon....sitting in your driveway.